Funny Signs Plumber: "We repair what your husband fixed. " Pizza shop slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak. " At a tire shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blow out. " Door of a plastic surgeons office: "Hello, can we pick your nose?" Sign at the psychic's hotline: "Don't call us, we'll call you. " In a funeral parlor: "Ask about our layaway plan. " In a clothing store: "Wonderful bargains for men with 16 and 17 necks. " In a Tacoma, Washington men's clothing store: "15 men's wool suits, $10. They won't last an hour!" On a shopping mall marquee: "Archery Tournament -- Ears pierced" Outside a country shop: "We buy junk and sell antiques. " In the window of an Oregon store: "Why go elsewhere and be cheated when you can come here?" In a Maine restaurant: "Open 7 days a week and weekends. " On a radiator repair garage: "Best place to take a leak. " In the vestry of a New England church: "Will the last person to leave please see that the perpetual light is extinguished. " In a Pennsylvania cemetery: "Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves. " In the window of a Kentucky appliance store: "Don't kill your wife. Let our washing machine do the dirty work. " On a roller coaster: "Watch your head. " On the grounds of a public school: "No trespassing without permission. " On a Tennessee highway: "When this sign is under water, this road is impassable. " Similarly, in front of a New Hampshire car wash: "If you can't read this, it's time to wash your car. " ------------------------ Giggle for healthy life From: GigglePedia. com

"I'll have to report you, sir, " said the traffic cop to the speeding driver. "You were doing 85 miles an hour. " "Nonsense, officer, " declared the driver. "I've only been in the car for ten minutes. " ------------------------------ "Now as I understand it, Sir, " said the police officer to the motorist, "you were driving this vehicle when the accident occurred. Can you tell me what happened?" "I'm afraid not, officer, " replied the motorist. "I had my eyes shut!" -------------------------------- "When I saw you driving down the road, I guessed 55 at least. " "You're wrong, officer, it's only my hat that makes me look that old. " ------------------------------- More at GigglePedia. com

Colorado Springs artist Jason Baalman is trying out an array of unusual mediums that can produce a picture on a canvass - be it ketchup with French fries, or chocolate syrup with a spoon. But this 30-year-old artist has an eye for technology too, as he has also painted a replica of the Mona Lisa using Microsoft's Paint accessory software. Since posting a video of himself painting portraits of Ronald McDonald and Morgan Spurlock, the creator of the documentary "Super Size Me," using ketchup and French fries on social networking website You Tube, Baalman - previously a struggling artist - has bagged a huge backlog of portrait orders.

The second class to enter the Air Force Academy since Sept. 11, 2001 graduated Thursday morning. It wasn't a grim ceremony. Along with watching a show by the Thunderbirds after the ceremony and tossing their hats in the air, the 1,000 member graduating class was also able to view video of a boogying cadet beforehand. Along with talking about what the dangers cadets will face on the battlefield, commencement speaker Defense Secretary Robert Gates told the cadets he had seen the funny video himself.

Looks like former Spice Girl and ultimate 'Footballer's Wife' Victoria 'Posh' Spice can't get a break. The former singer and aspiring fashion icon hasn't even started her All-American campaign just yet, and already a designer is trying to persuade her to stay put in England. New t-shirts emblazoned with the slogan "Free Becks, Keep Posh" have already gone on sale in an attempt to have soccer star David Beckham come to America sans his pouty wife.